Be a Star

"The darker the night, the brighter the stars, the deeper the grief, the closer is God."
       -Fyodor Dostoevsky.

Everyone wants to be a star. A movie star, a music star, any kind of star. Why are famous actors called stars?  They have an ability to supersede acting and brighten up a scene with their mere presence. Every person can be an actor but it is very difficult to be a star. Everybody wants to be a star because they want to be loved by others. They want to be successful and shine bright. It's hard to become a superstar. You have to stand out in the midst of so many actors and singers, having to train hard, work hard, be patient, and determined to win. But there is something even harder than becoming a superstar. Becoming a real star.

 God is calling each one of us to become stars.

 He wants us to become the best version of ourselves. He wants us to reach our highest potential and to be happy. The only way we can experience true happiness is by experiencing pain first, and through that pain help Jesus carry His cross, and on the way, help others carry their cross as well.

Be bright where there is darkness.

There is so much pain and grief in this world. Many ask: How can a God of love permit such things in His world as war, sickness, pain, and death? God allows us to suffer to turn closer to him. The holy spirit leads us to realize our needs of salvation and then turn to Christ in repentance and faith. Our suffering helps us develop a more Christ-like character.  Jesus came to the world not to deliver us from suffering but to teach us how to bear suffering, for he knew that there was no world without suffering. 

With that in mind, we should realize that every single person in the world suffers. Everyone suffers in a different way- one may be suffering sickness or a death in the family, while someone else may be experiencing unemployment, or worry over a friend or child. Many others experience things such as mental disorders, or just a hard day at work that we might not be aware of. 

Our job then, is to try to ease others' sufferings by showing everyone kindness and compassion, and it is through  our actions that we will ultimately lead others  to the light; Jesus Christ. Because only by being united in his sufferings will we ever realize that yes, everyone suffers, but how beautiful it is to suffer for him.


Guide people to The Light

How do you guide someone to the light? By being the light.  Jesus lives in every single one of us and He wants to reach others through you and me. It is our duty to evangelize. I'm not talking about the kind of evangelization where one goes door to door and asks people if they have been saved or tells them about the gospel. That is great, for a lot of people have still never heard of Jesus, but what He is asking for is not only to talk about the gospel, but rather live out the gospel. It's not easy, but that's the only way to become a star. God wants us to help people find the right direction. The one direction. By helping people go in the right direction, we help them become happier, which is every human's biggest desire. 

Ways to live out the Gospel

Ok, so now you are thinking...Then tell me how to be a star. How do I do it? By living the gospel! How can I live out the Gospel? The answer is simple: by loving more and better. By loving every single person that you meet because they were created by God. That is the first step, but it is very hard to accomplish. By the way, that does not mean you have to be friends with everyone, it means that you should accept every person and try to see life within their point of view; realize that they too suffer, and all they want in life is to be happy and loved, just like you, and have a desire to be treated with respect. I have found that in order to reach that level of understanding, first you have to practice the gospel. Here are some ways to do that:

1. Carrying out the corporeal works of mercy

- Feed the hungry: make lunches for the homeless, volunteer at a soup kitchen, share part of your lunch with your friend at school or coworker that forgot theirs or is not as good as yours, bake some cookies for someone who is hungry for love, teach someone how to make food you are good at making.

-Give drink to the thirsty- distribute water bottles to the homeless, give a cold soda to your mailman on a hot summer day, pour the water for others at dinner, donate money to an organization that makes water available to different parts of Africa, take shorter showers to conserve water, drink a lot of water yourself to feel and be healthier, give words of affirmation to people who are thirsting for approval or acceptance, talk about the gospel, invite people to come to a church event.

-Clothe the naked: look in your closet and donate clothes that you haven't worn in a while, take out some winter coats and scarves and distribute them to the homeless, if you see a friend that is cold, let them borrow your jacket, make blankets for expectant mothers, dress appropriately.

-To shelter the homeless: have a real conversation with a homeless person, let a friend stay at your home in times of trouble, go on a mission trip and help build houses, invite people to your house and let them feel welcome, host a surprise birthday party for someone who would never expect it.

- Visit the sick: visit lonely people in a hospital, send a care package to a child with cancer, offer to babysit for free if you know a family that is struggling, run for awareness, let someone with a mental illness know you are there for them, help make meals if a family member is sick, pray for the sick.

-Visit the imprisoned- visit people in jail, pray for people in jail, send letters to someone in jail, try to learn more about the American justice system, visit someone who is lonely, visit your grandparents ( I'm not implying they are prisoners but rather people who get to interact with other people less). 

-Bury the dead: attend funerals or memorial services of people you cared about, attend those services even if you did not know the person but to support their family, pray for the dead and their families, see if there is anything you can do to help a family going through a big loss, light a candle at a church for someone who has passed away, remember the good qualities of those who have passed and learn from them.

2. Carrying out the spiritual works of mercy

-Instruct the ignorant:  Let people know about your beliefs, have peaceful conversations with people from opposing political parties, teach a child how to read, learn how to speak sign language.

-Counsel the doubtful- give advice to a friend, help someone with their work or homework, let someone know about what Jesus has done in your life, let someone know they are great people, answer every child's question, even if they sound irrelevant or annoying.

-Admonish sinners- warn your friend that going out on a school night may not be the best idea, tell your kids what they are doing is wrong, tell a friend about your past mistakes in hopes of helping him (Always always remember though that as Christians, we should love the sinner, but hate the sin!)

-Bear wrongs patiently- be patient in the supermarket line, be patient when someone cuts you off in traffic, forgive, ask for forgiveness, breathe.

-Forgive offenses willingly- forgive your friends, pray for your enemies, say sorry, call your mother, tell someone they were right, accept you were wrong.

-Comfort the afflicted- hug someone, cry with someone, tell them everything will be ok, surprise someone sad at their house, let people know you will always be there for them, tell them to let you help them, write a card to someone going through a hard time, pray for them, give candy to a sad child, call a friend if you are aware something happened, smile at strangers, listen.

-Pray for the living and the dead- pray pray pray pray pray for everyone. Let people know you are praying for them, and do it. Light a candle for the dead at church. Sacrifice little things in your day and offer it up for people, do your homework and offer it up for your teacher or friend, don't eat that cookie and offer it up for someone who is sick. Go to daily mass to pray for someone; even the little things, if your friend is going to an interview or taking a test, offer the whole mass for them. Tell God everything. Become His best friend. 

3. Practice Random acts of Kindness

The Gospel tells us that Jesus practiced miracles. We do not have the ability to perform miracles, but we do have the ability to be Jesus' hands and feet and help make other people smile, or be the answer to a small prayer of theirs. By performing random acts of kindness, we allow ourselves to be 'used' by God. We have to be really silent to listen to his requests. Kindness is like snow. It beautifies everything it touches. There are immeasurable acts of kindness to be performed. It would be impossible to list them all. You just have to keep your eyes open and think of others before yourself. Always think: what could I do to make this person's day a little bit better? If you do that, you will spread so much joy around you, and in return, you will be filled by joy. God can never be outdone in generosity. Whatever you give to others, He will give you back twice more. 

There are many classic random acts of kindness such as paying for the person behind you in line or giving someone a compliment, but I want to provide you with a list of 11 random acts of kindness that require no money whatsoever and maybe you have never thought of.

     

     1.  Write a letter to someone who has been a star in your life, and might not know it.
     2.  Talk about what you are grateful for and encourage others to do the same.

     3. PRAY for the person behind you at the lunch counter.

     4. When someone does or says something rude or offensive, assume he is having a bad day and respond with compassion.

     5.  Find ways to help others avoid embarrassment.

     6. Tell your parents you love them and appreciate them. Call your grandparents and do the same. Send them pictures of good times or events you have attended.

     7. Donate blood.

     8. Let another person take the closer parking spot. Smile and wave.

     9.  Print and frame a good picture you have taken of someone and give it to them.

     10. Ask a friend about his day/how he is doing. Actually listen.

     11. Smile, smile, smile! Even if you are having a bad day... (Thanks for this one, Kylie!)

And if anyone asks you why you are being so kind, respond with: I am a Christian!

4. Don't ask: How can I help?  but rather say: let me help you with that.

So many times in my life I have realized that the people who have made the biggest difference are not those ask me: "Do you need help with that?" (which is an extremely kind thing to ask) but the problem is that even though I did need help, I feel too embarrassed to accept the help, so I just say: nothing, I've got it! Maybe the person was being totally sincere and wanted to help, but the last thing I ever want to do is bother them.  The people who always make the biggest difference are those who have said:  "oh, I see you're overwhelmed, let me help" and they start helping. Even if I tell them: no, it's OK! They continue helping. It's hard to be so assertive, but it makes you a star. Jesus didn't ask us if we wanted us for him to die on the cross for us. He just did it.

With that in mind, we should also be extremely open to help others in times of need, and following Mary on her example of saying yes. A couple of weeks ago, my really good friend's mom passed away. Two days before, she asked me if I could please send her the number of a specific priest because her mom was very sick and wanted a priest to give her the last rites. I sent her the number. And I told her that if she needed anything, that she should call me.  The next day, she called me in the middle of the night crying, telling me that they were scared her mom did not have enough time to live and that they needed a priest, she asked me to please send one to the hospital. Of course I said yes, and I frantically called all the priests I had saved as contacts on my phone and that live in the area. After calling around 10 and getting no answer from most of them (3 answered and said they either weren't able to drive this far or just weren't available), I called my parish's emergency line.  They said they would call back whenever they got a hold of a priest. I waited for more than half an hour while my friend was on the phone crying asking if I had found a priest, because even though she wasn't very religious, her mom was and that's all she wanted. I got really impatient and called 3 other churches. I mean, there had to be a priest available! Every church I called asked if I was a parishioner (no) and asked for my name and the family's name and a long list of questions, then they told me they would call back. As I called yet again another church, a priest answered. Little did I know that this call would make me never ask what can I do ever again, but rather let me do. I was distraught as I started talking, and I started explaining the situation. He did not let me finish, but rather just said: I'm on my way. Don't worry. I just need the hospital's room number. I gave it to him and he hung up. I called my friend and let her know a priest was on his way. Her sigh of relief brought me immense joy. I asked her if she wanted me to be there with her. She said no, that it was ok. I hung up the phone, and my mom told me we should go to the hospital. I just told her my friend had said no, and she just replied with: she needs you. We are going. So we went to the hospital and prayed in the chapel. I then texted my friend and told her we were downstairs. She asked me to please go up and she was so happy I had shown up. She just didn't want to bother me. The priest had already shown up and left (how prompt!). We stayed with her for a while and then returned home. The next day, I got a text message at 4 in the morning with the two most painful words anyone could ever hear: "she died." I unfortunately did not see the text until the next morning and called her. She cried, while I was completely silent, All I could think to say was: I'm sorry. And I love you. There really wasn't much more I could say. Because she had seen it was ok to ask for my help, she told me if I could please help arrange a memorial at the church that I had called earlier to find the priest because they had really liked him, and wanted him to celebrate the funeral mass if possible. I said yes, of course, even though I had no idea whatsoever how to even arrange something like that? I told my mom who unfortunately has had a lot of funerals to arrange and she told me that she would drive me to the church and we would figure it out. We did, and they gave us paperwork. The priest was there and he was extremely willing to perform the service. The service was beautiful. We later found out that this priest was married but his wife and son passed away in an accident. This is why he was willing to help so fast. He had felt what it was like to be in that position. He is a star. He said yes to God and yes to everyone around him. He is ready to help instead of asking if he can help. 

5. Never miss an opportunity to tell someone how much you love them, how important they are, or how much they mean to you.
If you love someone, tell them. You have no idea how long you have them on earth for, or you have no idea if something will change. Let people know they are important. We all need to hear that once in a while. Not all of us have our purpose in life set out and clear. If you think someone is cute, pretty or nice, tell them. Tell them everything good about themselves. Why keep it in? Some of my friends will make fun of me sometimes because I fall in love with people way too fast (Their personality, way of doing things, their smile) and I am not afraid to tell them what I love about them. I will stop them and tell them: Your curls are so cute, they match your personality! Or, you have been a great help to me, I love you! Sometimes I worry that I will come off as weird or stalkerish even, but I have never had a bad encounter my whole life by doing this. I remember so well all the genuine compliments I have received in my life. I remember being told my hair was pretty by a girl in my class, that my purple converse were cool by a stranger in the street, that I was pretty by a lady from my church. These compliments have never left me, they have a special place in my heart. 

Past examples of stars

Around two thousand years ago, there were three Magi. They wanted to receive The Real King into the world.  They did not know how to get there, so they followed a star. The star of Bethlehem. another example is Veronica. She wiped the face of Jesus when he was carrying his cross. She wasn't just a bystander, he took action and helped brighten the way. Simon of Cyrene was another star. We should all aspire to be Veronicas, to be Simons! Let's be stars and help others reach the truth! There are so many people that have been stars in the past such as Pope John Paul II, Mother Teresa, and billions more. That's our goal.

Present Examples of stars

There are many stars right now. We can follow their example to become like them:

*Kylie Meyers (Check out smileyforkylie on facebook) - She is what greatly inspired me to write this whole blog post. She spreads kindness and love every day amidst her great suffering. She's really young, and has captured so many people's lives.

*Pope Francis

*Matthew Kelly
*Malala
*Parents, role-models
*Priests everywhere
*Volunteers, doctors, nurses,teachers, school counselors, kind hearted people
*Taylor Swift. (Seriously, check out what she does to help people!)
*You??????

Lets all try to be stars to others this Lent. Help others carry their cross, sanctify yourself in order to reach God. Lets all be bright in the darkness. It is  not easy, but it is not impossible. 

Love always and be loved,

Steph